By this stage in your child’s life, your son or daughter is well on their way to becoming an adult. This is one of the most active times in a teen’s life and it is the time when peer pressure – particularly when it’s related to substance abuse, tobacco and sex – is at its peak. Your teen is faced with tough decisions every day about whether to cave in to the pressure or hold the line and stay clean.
Up until now, all the things you’ve taught your teen – plus what they’ve learned from their teachers, friends, the media, movies and television – has created your child’s attitude about experimenting or using tobacco. By age 16, your child clearly understands your stance on the subject, but this doesn’t mean you should be quiet. Keep an open conversation with your son or daughter and be honest and forthright, not confrontational or judgmental.
- Stick with the facts. Keep your messages clear and don’t pad the truth. Even occasional use of tobacco can lead to addiction and health problems. It can also serve as a gateway to other addictive substances.
- By now, your child is looking ahead to the future. This may include college, embarking on a career, getting a place to live or joining the military. The financial costs of tobacco use can really add up. Over the course of a few years it can be the down payment on a car, a deposit on an apartment or tuition. This is a good economic lesson about choices and trade outs.
- Acknowledge good behavior in your teen. Let them know when they made a good decision and offer constructive criticism when bad ones inevitably come their way. Don’t lecture. A teenager will just shut you out. And never talk down to your son or daughter. They want to be perceived as an equal; a young adult who deserves some measure of respect.
- Get your teen involved in community service. Having them volunteer at a community center, hospital or hospice may open their eyes to the effects tobacco use has had on older generations. Seeing an elderly person on an oxygen tank or meeting someone who has lost a jaw to bone cancer can accomplish more than hours of lectures.
- If your teen is involved with the use of tobacco products, don’t condone the act. Don’t allow them to smoke at your house or in the yard. If they argue this with you just tell them, "I care about you too much to watch you hurt yourself".
- Don’t distance yourself from your young adult, no matter what they are experimenting with. At some point, they will bottom out and you need to still be there to help them quit their addiction to tobacco or other substances. Never withhold your love, even if you must withhold your approval.